For many Americans, Memorial Day signals the start of summer. It’s a day off from work, the day we open our pools, have backyard barbecues, or spend the day at the beach. But Memorial Day is much more than that. Originally termed Decoration Day, the tradition started in the late 1860s to commemorate the sacrifices made by Civil War soldiers. The first official Decoration Day was on 30 May 1868 at Arlington National Cemetery where thousands of people placed flowers on the graves of Union soldiers. In the years since the holiday has evolved to honor all those who have lost their lives while defending our nation. 1
As I looked through the hundreds of people in my extended family tree I found two men who died during their service in the Civil War. Cornelius and Henry Stilwell (also spelled Stillwell) married sisters Angeline and Hannah Hendrickson, daughters of Valentine Hendrickson and Ann Van Sise of Oyster Bay. Angeline and Hannah are my 5x-great aunts.
Cornelius, a widower, with two young boys, William and George, married Angeline on 29 November 1858. 2 Their daughter Almira was their only child together. Henry and Hannah had two children, Charles and Valentine Stilwell.
Cornelius and Henry were probably related but so far my research hasn’t revealed how. Vital records didn’t exist anywhere in New York at that time and I haven’t been able to verify relationships through online trees.
On 15 April 1861, Lincoln called for 75,000 volunteers following the Confederate attack on Fort Sumpter in South Carolina to suppress the rebellion. 3 The defeat at Bull Run would dash any hopes of a quick victory and by July Lincoln would issue a new call for 500,000 volunteers. 4
At the onset of the war, Oyster Bay witnessed a surge of patriotic fervor fueled by enlistment drives that would pass through many of the villages in town. Despite the small population of less than 8,000 people, more than 2,000 young men of Oyster Bay were some of the first to volunteer for service. 5
Cornelius enlisted first on 4 November 1861 at Cold Spring Harbor which is adjacent to Oyster Bay and within the town of Huntington. He was mustered on that same day. 6 Henry enlisted two weeks later at Cold Spring Harbor on 22 November 1861. 7 They were assigned to Company C 102nd Regiment New York Volunteers.
The Civil War was the deadliest war ever fought on American soil. Life and conditions for men on the battlefront was grim. A little-known fact is that more soldiers died of disease than were killed in battle. Of the 620,000 recorded military deaths in the Civil War about two-thirds died from disease. The most common killers were diarrhea and dysentery, followed by malaria, typhoid fever, and pneumonia, which were fueled by lack of sanitation, inadequate diet, improper hygiene, and contaminated water. Medical care was primitive. Doctors had no understanding of how to treat or contain infectious diseases 8
As part of Company C 102nd New York Volunteers, Cornelius and Henry left New York City for Washington D.C. in March of 1862. 9 They endured several battles together including the Battle of Cedar Mountain, Antietam, Chancellorsville, and the Battle of Gettysburg. 10 After Gettysburg, the regiment headed south and on 6 September 1863 Henry died at Point Lookout, Maryland. 11 It is likely that on the way down from Gettysburg to Virginia he was taken to Hammond General Hospital which was located adjacent to the notorious United States prisoner of war camp. His cause of death was chronic diarrhea. 12 It is unknown where he is buried.
Cornelius went on to fight in the Battle of Lookout Mountain and the Battle of Atlanta. 13 He lived long enough to see the fall of Atlanta. He died about a week later on 13 September 1864 of chronic diarrhea at the 2nd Division, 20th Army Corps Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia. 14 He was buried at Marietta National Cemetery in Georgia. 15
All in all, the 102nd Regiment participated in over 40 battles and minor engagements, burying their dead in over seven states. 16 During its service, the regiment lost 7 officers and 66 enlisted men killed or mortally wounded and 82 enlisted men to disease. 17 Four enlisted men died in the hands of the enemy. 18 New York dedicated a monument to the 78 & 102nd New York infantry in 1888 at Gettysburg. 19
Cornelius and Henry’s names are among 40 listed on a plaque at the Soldiers and Sailors Memorial Building in Huntington which was built in 1892 to commemorate the men of Huntington who lost their lives in the war.
On 28 December 2000, President Clinton signed into law the “National Moment of Remembrance Act,” creating the White House Commission on the National Moment of Remembrance. Its charter is to “encourage the people of the United States to give something back to their country, which provides them so much freedom and opportunity.” It also encourages Americans wherever they are at 3 PM to pause for a moment of silence in honor of the men and women of the United States who died in the pursuit of freedom and peace. 20
Memorial Day has evolved over the years, but even back in the early years the somber tradition of decorating graves was followed by music, parades, picnics and sports. However you decide to commemorate, take a moment and remember the true meaning of Memorial Day.
Image Sources
Carol M. Rothsmith, “The 78th and 102nd New York Infantry monument at Gettysburg National Military Park in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, site of the fateful battle of the U.S. Civil War,” June 2019, C-DIG-highsm-58392; Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division, Washington; imaged online at Library of Congress, Highsmith (Carol M.) Archive, database with images (https://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2019690816 : downloaded 28 May 2023).
“Point Lookout, Md. View of Hammond Genl. Hospital & U.S. genl. depot for prisoners of war,” map (Point Lookout, MD: Everett, George, 1864) L.C. Control Number: 99447401; Civil War Maps, Geography and Map Division, Library of Congress, Washington, D.C; imaged in “Digital Collections” database with images, Library of Congress (https://www.loc.gov/item/2003656672 : downloaded 28 May 2023).
Ancestry, Find A Grave, database with images (https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/3957188/cornelius-stillwell : accessed 28 May 2023), memorial 3957188 , Cornelius “Stillwell”, Marietta National Cemetery, Marietta, Cobb County, Georgia, memorial by US Veterans Affairs Office and photo contributed by “JT Nelms”.
New York State, New York State Military Museum Catalog, digital image, “Reunion Photograph of the 78th and 102nds New York Volunteers Infantry Regiments at Gettysburg, PA.” photo no. PA.2018.0044 (http://catalog.nysmm.org/Presto/content/GetImage.axd?ctID=ZDhjMmE5MjktYTE3Yi00M2Y0LWJmYjYtZDIxZWRlNmIxN2Vi&rID=MTI5NDY=&pID=NjE2&uSesDM=False&rIdx=MTA3ODIw&rCFU=&aw=RGV0YWlsfHNjcmVlbklEXzE5MzA0fGNudHJsSURfMTM1MTk= : downloaded 28 May 2023).
Robert C. Hughes, (Huntington, Suffolk, New York), to Desiree Hendrickson, email, 25 May 2023, provided photograph of Civil War tablet at the Soldiers and Sailors Building, Huntington, New York.